"Looting Villages from/of Jokes"

Topic Tuesday via...

"Looting Villages from/of Jokes"

I just picked one quickly so I didn't have to look at any more clown pictures. Source

It was high time.  They had scared the children.  They had buggered the sheep.  They had stolen the Sacred Pear.  It was time for the Painted Faces to go.

And we wanted our Pear back.


We surrounded their caravan of carts and tents, setting fires and spreading confusion with the help of Faber the Fervid, an itinerant priest of Arar.  The Faces poured out of their caravans, swinging hammers, flails and whatever else came to hand, howling and hooting, and spraying strange alchymical potions on hapless attackers in a bid to turn back our assault.  Stalwart farmers froze in fear before their frightening visages, but enough bore the fear enough to press ahead.

But in the end, we somehow bested them - our band of The Sheriff, his Reeves, and our sturdy posse of farmers.  We recovered our relic, as well as clearing out their ill-gotten gains, the riches and provisions fortifying our humble village for the winter.  They fled down the road, cackling and gibbering.

... but we never figured out how they got 20 of themselves into an ox-cart.

Painted Faces

Castaways from the sundry carnivals and circuses that ply the countryside, these miscreant performers make their way via performance, terror, graft, and theft. Their faces painted and hidden behind parodies of masks, the Painted Faces who were once harmless performers have become twisted minions of chaos and discord.

Prereqs: Dex 13, Cha <12

HD: 1d4
Alignment: Chaotic, very chaotic...

Level and save as per Thief

No Armor allowed, Starts with Dex AC bonus, gains +1 AC per 3 levels

Weapons: Club, dagger, hammer, flail, whip (1d2 + trip/entangle/disarm chance) or improvised weapons (1d4)

Start with 3 skills.

Add one per three levels.  Any new skill starts as if at first level and gains increasing mastery with each level.  (Where skills overlap with thief skills, use your favorite thief charts; others are a bit open-ended and open to interpretation or cross-pollination - Hey, I'm coming up with a character class under self-imposed deadline here....)

Skills:

1. Throwing Things - Any improvised thrown object strikes at 1d4 (add + 1 per 3 levels)
2. Improvised Weapon - Any improvised weapon (club, chair, frypan, etc) - +1 to hit/damage (add +1 per 3 levels)
3. Seltzer Bottle - Carries a pressurized bottle full of a random liquid (roll 1/day):  1) Soak - wets target, stings eyes 1d4 rounds (-2 to hit); 2) Stain - indelible mark on target, blinded 1d4 rounds; 3) Slip - target saves or takes fall, drops any held object; 4) Stink - target and those in 10' radius save or nauseated 1d4 rounds;  5) Sticky - targets saves or immobile 1d4 rounds, can't drop any object; 6) Smashed - target inebriated 1d4 turns; 7) Sneeze - target saves or sneezing fit 1d4 rounds (no actions except defense); 8) Sleep - target saves or falls asleep 1d4 turns; 9) Smoke - obscuring 10' radius cloud 1d4 rounds; 10) Sap - target saves or loses 1d4 Str and 1d4 Con points for 1 day.
4. Contortion - Fit into confined space - especially useful for fitting into boxes for infiltration or filling vehicle with compatriots. 
5. Sleight of Hand - Simple 'magic' tricks, pick-pocketing, misdirection.
6. Sucker Punch - sudden unexpected attack - does not need to be a 'backstab' - could be a pie in the face - +2 to hit, 1.5 damage with surprise (round down)
7. Dirty Fighting - (eyegouge, knees, bites, etc. on top of whatever other thing you're fighting with) +1d2 damage in melee
8. Tumbling - Acrobatics, balancing, falling damage reduction 50%
9. Juggling - Juggle 3 objects, + 1 per 2 levels.  May also catch and re-throw a thrown object or weapon in a single round with a successful Dex check (follow with normal to-hit roll)
10. Weaponized Juggling:  Juggled objects may be thrown sequentially within a round. One or multiple targets.
11. Pick Locks - As per thief, except max at 85 %
12. Miming - Silent communication with other Painted Faces.  Also makes people really nervous.
13. Scare - 1d4 targets must save vs fear as per spell, +1 additional target per level.