Another day, another D66 list. Actually, this one isn't out of whole cloth, but is an expansion of another list I did a few years back and recently rediscovered. There, I'd made up a list of 18 (or "36" d66) oddball goblins in response to someone's Santicore request.
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| These guys... |
Better fill that list out to the current standard:
D66 Gonzo Goblins
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| by John D Batten |
11. Dervish Quibbles: Dancing fools. +1 to morale checks for chaos-forces in the immediate area. Save or become mesmerized by their dance. The rat-skin kilts and scalp tutus are a nice touch.
12. Necro-prosthetic Qols: Equipped with up to six extra undead limbs sutured on. These limbs may or may not be goblin, or even humanoid. They gain one additional attack per grasping limb (strikes at -2, -1 damage).
13. Immolative Booms: Injected with alchemical solvents, these suicide-troopers fling themselves into battle as they burst into flame, 10’ radius damage.
D4:
1. Blue – cold flame – 1d6+1 freezing damage to anyone within range.
2. Yellow – 1d6 damage, cannot be dowsed with water. Water causes the flames to scatter and spatter. Those set aflame may only smother the flames (taking 1d4 damage for an additional 1d3 rounds).
3. Red – sucks all oxygen out of air – 1d6 suffocation damage/round, all flame sources extinguished.
4. Green – 1d6 damage, any metal gear worn or carried corrodes.
14. Fungal-blooming Nurgles: Shroom-infested shambling wastrels. 25% chance of being a hive-mind capable of coordinated action. Spore clouds released by melee will cause anyone killed in battle to rise as a fungal zombie.
15. Accretionary Fibbits: Meld together by running headlong into one another. They will merge until they are a large, sticky ball of limbs and teeth. Unwieldy, they roll into a fray, causing crushing and abrading damage (1d4 per two goblin-bodies accreted).
16. Luminescent Fleens: Glow with sickly yellow or green pulsing lights, half the range of a torch. A skewered goblin will provide light for 2d6 turns before dissolving into a puddle of dimming goo.
21. Scar-written Reavers: Decorated with baroque curses carved into their flesh. Act as protection vs good (60%), mirror image (25%), teleport (10%), or reanimate dead (5%, reanimates slain goblin).
22. Tortoise Dragoons: Known as one of the most resilient, yet most tardy, Chaos war-force. Goblin cavaliers will typically be seen playing cards, composing songs, or painting their mounts’ shells while in the midst of a “charge.” They may reach battle sometime after hostilities have ceased, or, if the riders are slain by faster opponents, the tortoises will continue to trundle, unperturbed, through the battle, not causing any damage, other than pausing to graze.
23. Pixie-snorting Hoons: Addicted to dried pixies, which have been crushed into a coarse powder. These goblins will typically be found tripping balls and sneezing glitter. Spend most of their energy attempting to catch more fairies with bolos and nets.
24. Fermented Pikers: Stored in stasis in casks of distilled spirits by certain chaos-lords as an ‘instant’ battle force. When broken out from the casks, they will form an inebriated phalanx and charge into battle. 33% chance that they will attack the wrong force.
25. Inflatable Flatulents: Expand with intestinal gas from an exceptionally high-fiber diet. Massed flatulents will either attempt to asphyxiate foes or light farts for 1d4 burst flame damage (+1 damage for each additional flatulent, range 15’). Slaying an inflated flatulent will cause it to explode, causing 1d4 damage in a 5’ radius, with the potential for a flatulent chain-reaction explosion. Unseasonably warm in their vicinity.
26. Beetle Pinchers: Are found meditating within the pain-ecstasy of various large beetles hung from their mortified flesh. They speak in tongues through their agony. Unfortunately, all they channel are alien beetle-gods.
31. Arboreal Snits: Gifted with extra-long forearms, these live in trees, stealing stuff and throwing flaming poo. They tend to gang-tackle a single foe and have a penchant for ripping the teeth from still-living victims for necklaces. They do not have the sunlight penalty of normal goblins.
32. Meditative Oppugners: Living in abandoned churches and monasteries, where they interpret random pamphlets, recipes, poetry, shopping lists, etc. as theological texts. This will eventually devolve into monastery-wide battle until a single combatant is left, holding aloft a bent candlestick or similar improvised weapon, screaming “I am the serenest!” Generally illiterate.
33. Throbbing Grissles: Become exceptionally aroused by battle. Disturbingly so… Ohgodwhatarethosetwogoblinsdoing?
34. Swimming Gits: Often mistaken for stunted sahuagin, these semi-aquatic goblins evolved/were mutated to have webbed feet and hands. They wield nasty little barbed bone javelins. Four or more chanting together for four rounds can summon a small water weird (3HD). Not that they can control it or anything.
35. Tinkersnitches: Clanking into battle adorned in an array of absconded gnomish clockwork armor, likely damaged and malfunctioning.
D8:
1-2: Armor binds up or seizes. Wearer held immobile for 1d4 rounds
3-5: Armor augments melee damage +2
6-7: Armor malfunctions and injures its wearer, 1d4 damage
8: Armor improves normal goblin AC by 2.
36. Cthidiots: Somehow got into a batch of Elder Gods. Horrifically mutated with random tentacles, sores weeping tar-like ichor, scaly gills, and/or bug eyes. May randomly phase-shift to alien planes, returning as either blubbering, mindless shells, or conduits for ineffable alien intelligences. Best to stay clear.
41. Mental Hurlants: Obsessive trebuchet-builders and siege engineers. Occasionally get a bit exuberant, tossing one of their own over a fortress wall.
42. Howlveliers: Elite wolf-riding goblin-cavalry wearing cuirasses of lizard skin and stolen flatware (+2AC). D6X2 damage when charging, plus wolf attack (2+2 HD, AC 12, 1d6 damage).
43. Helter-Kellers: Ritually blinded shock troops, screeching in ineffective echolocation while swining battle-scythes (1d6). Hell on everyones' ankles.
44. Aerial Buffoonists: Hot air ballooninsts flying contraptions constructed of pig skin and bad ideas. Love dropping offal-filled sheep bladders and firebombs on foes. Occasionally attempt to “fish” someone or something up with a grappling hook. Have been known to explode in colorful conflagrations. Oh, the Gobmanity!
45. Myxogrenadiers: Wielding crocks of green slime and small, angry oozes to hurl at foes. Occasionally trip, breaking their bandoleers of carried vessels, and are consumed in a gelatinous eruption.
46. Repto-Cassioneers: Chariot troops pulled by a pair of giant lizards (3+1 HD, AC14, 1d8 damage bite, chariot 2d6 overrun damage). Chariots are typically overloaded with screaming goblin peltasts. Crashed charioteers are often consumed by the draft animals of a following wave of chariots.
51. Ningits: Goblins infiltrators renowned by their ability to move silently, as well as their creepy ability to apparently hide within their own shadows. Often betrayed by their own giggling.
52. Arachnophonics: Spider-whisperers, they alternatively ride and are dragged in web cocoons by their irascible mounts. Brandish clawed hands dripping in spider venom (1d3+ save vs poison, +2).
53. Esotericist Quantums: Crafting sigils and mathematical theorems from pilfered and poorly-understood mathematical texts, these goblin conjurers inadvertently invoke logical demons that are confounded by their chaotic summoners.
54. Obulating Pankratists: Their skin implanted with thorns, old nails, and glass shards, these mad goblin pugilists leap and grapple, causing injury to both themselves and their foes (1d4 'hug' damage until dislodged or slain, take 1d2 damage to self each round of contact).
55. Astringent Expectorants: Gargling and belching, these foul goblins consume all matters of offal and compost prior to contact. Running in tho the fray, they vomit acidic black pile at their foes (1d6 acid damage to flesh and gear, two rounds).
56. Itchy-bana: Combat flower-arrangers, scouring the battlefield with bundles of cut flowers to adorn the haphazard dead. Rearrange and array amputated limbs and scattered weaponry to improve the martial feng shui of the place.
61. Perambulating Tillers: Disrespected goblin farmers who toil behind their draft-hogs rooting up furrows to plant tubers and nettles. Generally peaceful, whistling atonal tunes and wearing elaborate straw hats.
62. Abjurating Felisters: Goblin cat-wranglers employed to recruit otherwise disinterested mousers to bring the downfall of farming hamlets via cessation of rodent control. Mostly just end up with a lot of scratches.
63. Ahnud Swarzenboogers: Bulked up goblins from a combination of weight training and questinable growth serums concocted by shady alchemists (+1HD, 1d8 base damage). Grow odd tufts of hair and have the tendency to fly into unpredictable rages. Must get a pump on and pose down before any battle.
64. Akrilic Banksies: Goblins simply satisfied with painting and the graffiti arts. Known to sneak into stables to vandalize knights' chargers. Considered a bit daft. Mostly just draw dicks.
65. Bookish Nebblinizers: Nerds! Always reading and shit. Mostly get sand kicked in their faces by other goblins.
66. Performative Greeblings: Silent, smiling entertainer-goblins. Wear clown makeup and make balloons out of small animals. Definitely disturbing, even to other goblins.
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| by Henry Justice Ford |
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